Do you know the 5 ‘love languages’ of text?
Can you read between the WhatsApp ‘text’ lines?
Most of us wave goodbye to our Lover / Spouse (hopefully that’s the same person) in the morning, and then the communication for the rest of the day is almost exclusively on text.
Dr Mimi Winsberg (a Stanford-trained psychiatrist) has recently released a book called : ‘Speaking in Thumbs: A Psychiatrist Decodes Your Relationship Texts, So You Don’t Have To’. The Book is all about helping people understand how texting impacts our relationships. Double-thumbing mobile messages has generally become the dominant mode of communication. Dr. Winsberg argues that each person has ways they want to express and experience love, and these preferences clearly manifest in texts.
Remember the Book: ‘The Five Love Languages’ by Gary Chapman (published in 1992)? I still hear people referring to this book, and trying to decipher and understand the differences in how their romantic partners express and experience love.
Dr. Winsberg’s book introduces five 'text love languages':
1. Compliments,
2. Riffing (rapid-fire banter),
3. Spoon-feeding (sending an interesting read or meme, or little personal updates),
4. Nooking (sweet nothings, like “XO,” or sexting), and
5. Nudging (reminders that you’re thinking of them).
I sat back and thought about my ‘text love language’ with my hubbie. I have realised that he ‘relishes’ Number 5 : ‘Nudging’. Number 1 can work, but, in his humble way / manner he’ll often ‘fling’ the compliment back at me. In one of my previous romantic ‘interludes’ … which I have to admit was intense and wow-oh-wow 'high chemistry'…
Number 2 : ‘Riffing’ was how we communicated, and it was an awesome 'interlude (on many levels). However, the relationship... quite quickly hit a crescendo, and then, as quickly fizzled out.
Back to the 'present'. My self- reflection is that I also 'relish' Number 5, and really enjoy Number 3.
As Aristotle said : “Knowing yourself is the beginning of all wisdom.”
If we are to improve our #EmotionalIntelligence, let's start by improving our #communication with our Lover (aka Spouse) or ‘soon -to-be Lover’ #cleariskind #bounceforward #relationships #enneagram #selfawareness